As we draw towards the American celebration of Thanksgiving, I wanted to find out the meaning behind it and this is what I found.
Thanksgiving is a chance to appreciate the good things in life, like family, community, and the riches of the land; gratitude for creation, care for the environment, and recognition of the human need for communion with nature and others. Thanksgiving as a holiday originates from the Native American philosophy of giving without expecting anything in return.
I suppose like Christmas for us, it has largely been commercialised but unlike Christmas that has its roots in the Christian faith, the origins of Thanksgiving are more generic and relevant to everyone, the world over.
My son is currently working in a school in Nepal and is grateful for the experience and loving the beautiful landscapes so I have chosen this photo (not my son) to show gratitude.
How can we be grateful for our beautiful countryside, water, air, animals and all that allow us to escape from our daily thoughts and worries, our 'to do' list and look outside of us to the nature that sustains us and makes us realise how unimportant most of these things are.
Right now our farmers are trying to make us realise how they need our support, how we need to value what is produced on our land, pay a fair price and protect their farms so that we don't have to rely on other countries for our food. Increasingly at school children are being taught where food comes from and many schools are creating gardens for children to connect with nature which is scientifically proven to be good for us.
I think we all had a huge appreciation of community during lockdown. I remember seeing videos of people in Italy sending food down a rope to families in need, people chatting across balconies and musicians playing outside apartment blocks and in streets so that people didn't feel so alone and fragile. We reached out to those in need, shopping for them and putting chairs outside your house to talk to someone across the road.
I've chosen this picture to represent community because it reminds me of something I read in a book about the search for happiness where the author interviews a top business executive friend of his about happiness and he says "I'll be happy when I get this promotion" and he went on to talk to others with lots of money and power and happiness was something they'd have when they had more money. He then went back down to the foyer and found the cleaners sitting in a circle on the floor, eating the lunch they'd brought in. They had little money, their houses would have been small and simple but they were laughing and chatting happily. He asked them why they were happy and they said it made them happy to be together, eating and talking and being in community.
Family is so important to me, it is everything and I guess it is for you too. But there are many who have lost family members and for whom this time of year is particularly sad. There are also those who wish they did have family, maybe they are alone or maybe they are trying for a baby and desperately want a family. There are children and young people living on the street who feel unsafe and want to be held in a family, loved and looked after. There are those in war zones separated from their loved ones who wonder if they will see them again. I'm also thinking of children whose parents have separated or divorced and they want to be a family again and are struggling to cope with the new concept of a family split.
I've chosen this photo partly because I am a grandma! It would be so easy to find photos of happy families but I don't want to upset anyone who doesn't have this rather unreal illusion of the perfect family because I don't feel it exists. Mums have enough stress without that! The elders of the tribe have always been important as a base camp, a place to turn to where you know you will have love and acceptance. Where perhaps not doing their homework or having a messy room doesn't matter quite so much. Children and teens worried such a lot about their grandparents during the pandemic and missed them. They also worried about their parents. Much has been made of what they missed at school but emotionally it was hard for them to be separate from family members whilst at the same time, many enjoying having more time with their parents.
Let me share with you something I encourage my clients to do.
Before going to bed, write a few words or draw a picture of what you are grateful for today. Think about that smile from a friend, an encouraging nod from your teacher, a hug from your annoying sibling(!) it can be anything that you feel grateful for today.
This is a great way to complete the day and go to bed with thanksgiving, giving thanks for your blessings; those who have made today special and given you joy in your heart. Think too of how you made someone else's day, how you spread love and joy to a friend in the playground, your mum, granny, your teammate in your football/soccer game, your brother or sister. Some days it may seem like you've given more than you've received and some days are like that, but when we give without condition that it will be returned, it stores up and suddenly you will get a whole bunch of it back I promise you.
Happy Thanksgiving to you all wherever you are in the world.
I finish with this lovely photo : a happy laughing child, a book and nature.
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